“I Stole Jesus”

Someone stole the Baby Jesus from a nativity scene — but this time, Jesus was packing a GPS device.

Police subsequently arrested Danielle Santino, 18, of Lake Worth, Fla. and charged her with grand theft. She was still in jail late Thursday.

“I stole Jesus,” she told police, according to the newspaper.

Baby Jesus told police, “The goddamn GPS thing kept saying, ‘Left turn in… one… point three… miles — BING! You have arrived!’ I wanted to fucking crush it with all the power of God.”