Position Flexible!

Posted on 11/13/2008 at 5:02 pm by Bob Cesca

Tell me if you can make heads or tails of this:

BLITZER: Does that mean you want to come up with a new Sarah Palin initiative that you want to release right now.

PALIN: Gah! Nothing specific right now. Sitting here in these chairs that I’m going to be proposing but in working with these governors who again on the front lines are forced to and it’s our privileged obligation to find solutions to the challenges facing our own states every day being held accountable, not being just one of many just casting votes or voting present every once in a while, we don’t get away with that. We have to balance budgets and we’re dealing with multibillion dollar budgets and tens of thousands of employees in our organizations.

Lord? It’s Bob again. I know. I’m not religious. But I beg of you, let Sarah Palin continue to talk to the press. And please let her continue to be this ridiculous. Seriously, do you have any idea what “sitting here in these chairs that I’m going to be proposing but in working” means? Anyhoo, if it’s not too much to ask, let her run for president in 2012. Starting now. I promise I’ll try not to swear so much. Amen.

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  • jmrunning3

    What’s so hard about that: Palin wants governors to sit in chairs on the front lines while balancing tens of thousands of employees’ budget organizations while casting votes or present-getting every once in awhile.*sheesh*Does her mind actually work this way or does it just get garbled between her brain and vocalization?PS: Loved the prayer, Bob.

  • gyutty

    It’s quite clear that Palin has an organic brain disease. She needs professional help. Kind of sad really.Then again, she may run as the first Mentally-Challenged candidate in 2012.

  • dontpanic23

    My brain…POWShe really said “Gah!”?

  • anotherbreakfastwithyou

    “I promise I’ll try not to swear so much.”*Guffaws*

  • GItheJOE

    Bob, be very careful what you wish/pray for. I don’t think my mind could handle an entire campaign season of this woman talking. Plus, her followers will get everyone of their crazy relatives out in force to support her. She and McCain got 56 million votes of stupidity this time. 4 years of peace and prosperity won’t change their minds. Obama will be labeled a baby killer or a gay rights activist. I say again, you can’t reason with crazy. It really is intellectual violence.

  • http://obamaproject.windonwater.net QueenTiye

    LOL! Yay! More Bob prayers! :) I think we should start compiling a Bob-prayer book.QT

  • http://obamaproject.windonwater.net QueenTiye

    DP – GAH! “Gah” is a perfectly wonderful word that I use frequently. No making fun of “Gah!” In fact – it’s so useful for those of us who don’t say “f**k” quite as much as some others of us, that it sometimes serves as a whole paragraph.QT

  • GItheJOE

    Can we call it the “Apocalypse of Bob” Book I and Book II?

  • http://livefreeordie08.wordpress.com LiveFreeOrDie08

    Maybe it’s the moose stew? Could she have a parasite burrowing into her frontal lobes?I wonder which America she’d go to to get treatment? And if her Dr. happened to have attended a luncheon where he sat beside Bill Ayers would she jump up off the operating table yelling “domestic terrrrerrrist!”Or maybe she’d just pay a visit to Grampa McCain’s fix’em up good shops where they use the hatchet first and then the scalpel!

  • dontpanic23

    Bob, if you get an ear with the big guy can you have Pat Buchanan turned into a newt?

  • KatinWilm

    I’m thinking position bumper cars on this one. It sounds interesting and exotic, but when you really get into it, it makes absolutely no sense and is just a pain in the ass. The woman has diarrhea of the mouth, but says nada.I’ll second your prayer, too. Except for the swearing part. God knows me too well and would know I’d be lying on that one. I’ve promised him many a time while my head has been in a toilet that I’d quit drinking if he’d let me live…and we know how that’s turned out.

  • http://obamaproject.windonwater.net QueenTiye

    GItheJOE – yes! Very appropriate! I, of course, am quietly praying for at least one or two actual prayers from Bob, but I’m ok with the “fake it till he makes it” model. ;) LOL!QT

  • Kristin Teigen

    You should put together a calendar (a la the Bush ones), complete with all of these inane, mind-boggling, vertigo-producing quotes and make a million for the blog. You can get all of the pictures that have her huge, half-open mouthed smiles and Photoshop various items about to fly or propel themselves in…

  • dontpanic23

    QT, gotcha, I apologize. Amend that to “she said…the rest of that?”I certainly wouldn’t want my f**k spasms taken and I won’t take your g*h.

  • The Colonel

    Do the republicans take pride in making America dumber?

  • http://obamaproject.windonwater.net QueenTiye

    Meanwhile, I’m probably not going to be around for the prime time thread so I have to share this with everyone. Honest to pete – my eyes are all watery now. This just makes me smile: http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200811u/appalachia-obamaQT

  • kansasdem

    Listening to her is More. Painful. Than. Listening. To. Bush.Holy shit! From Bushisms to Palinisms!I really can’t take it! Please Sarah, just STFU!Until you run for POTUS, then it’ll be funny again!

  • GItheJOE

    COL, yes sir!!! They love the idea of making this country dumber. It is easy to use intellectual violence against the 56 million supporters of stupidity.

  • http://peggystone263@msn.com peggygeorge

    QueenTiye, thanks so much for the Appalachia link. It just heartens me no end. And makes it even less defensible that a person like Palin, who could certainly have educated herself if she had wanted to, remained wilfully ignorant and unwilling to add one jot to her world view, when people who are living in such a huge pocket of poverty are still willing to use their brains and add new material when they can get it.None of my ancesters were from Appalachia, but I have always liked “God willing and the creek don’t rise” and sometimes use it myself.

  • dontpanic23

    QT, a boy who grew up in the neighborhood here but came from farther up the mountain (rather than down here in the holler), think of Steinbeck’s Lenny now, he’s about as redneck as they come and not bright enough to finish 8th grade (but has a heart of gold). Wears the same clothes for a week, works in the stockyard (yes, eww), cusses a blue streak and drinks like, well Kat. He is staying on my couch for a couple of nights. Before the election he had seen my Obama gear all over the house, car and person, and while drunk had picked my brain on Obama in his very basic way. I had him convinced it was in his best interest (knowing he wouldn’t vote–he didn’t), but what he did was take his big ole overalled self up that mountain in SW VA (real America) and talk about how His Man Obama was gonna win. Nobody argued even when they wanted to. Now he waxes eloquent in his drawl about how “we did it” and “yes we did” and it makes me proud to hear him (especially after the fiasco that is my son). His parents don’t let him stay there when he’s around so I wonder if he just looks up to me, but something made him take in the Obama campaign and tote it over the hill. Maybe some of the people in that article ran into my “Lenny”.Pardon my lapsing into the local-speak. Sometimes my brain just goes there.

  • cactusgal

    Hey Bob–Jehovah here.Sorry I didn’t get back to you sooner, but that Queen Tiye woman takes up a lot of My time & neither one of you is the only flea on the G-O-D, if you catch My drift.Anyhoo, just thought I’d let you know that we took a vote, and it looks like I’m going to have to smite Sarah Palin. It’s going to take a few months, though. My boy J is demanding a recount.Toodles,Godfrey Daniels(Haha just a little Deity humor)

  • dontpanic23

    Haaaahahaha PMPLMAO Cactus. Change pants now.And fuck typekey

  • Nanotyrannus

    What we really should pray for is Sarah to snag an interview on the BBC. With some snarky, bold piece of awesomely hot British humanity. Those guys would NEVER let her get away with spewing that gibberish. They’d look right at her and ask if she needed to have one of those nifty devices wired into her head to rein in the random noise generator that runs non-stop.Honestly, for some reason she gets a free pass. I wouldn’t have hired her nonsensical ass at Old Navy.

  • http://www.broadwaycarl.blogspot.com Broadway Carl

    Awesome also such as!

  • http://www.twistoflime.com Tracy Adams

    I tried running it through a special B.S. Babel fish but only diarrhea would come out.

  • PackyJ

    I read that through several times.I cannot make any sense of it.Gawd, she’s my governor.I’m sorry, America… but you’re welcome, Democratic Party.Palin in 2012!

  • PackyJ

    If anyone is interested:http://palinspeak.com/I thought the randomly generated Palinspeak phrases generated here were funny… but they actually make as much sense as she does. Sometimes more sense.And also.

  • http://peggystone263@msn.com peggygeorge

    Ha, ha. I tried asking Palinspeak.com “How do you explain your complete lack of curiosity about the larger world?” Try it and see.

  • LanCoPA

    But, despite the numerous goofy, blabbering, inane things she says, there are still millions of people who think she could be president! There is something substantially more wrong with them than her!

  • dontpanic23

    Q: How do you explain your complete lack of curiosity about the larger world?PALIN: But I’ve been expected to do and what I have understood the world is and how important it is in even greater peril than it is real.Yikes.

  • PackyJ

    Nano: Palin interviewed by the BBC would be brutal. They wouldn’t let her psychotic babbling pass.

  • http://cousinavi.wordpress.com cousinavi

    Let me be clear about one thing – I hate/love Sarah Palin with far more depth, breadth and intensity than ANY of you milquetoast wannabe pretend Sarah Stalkers. Don’t make me stab you.Nevertheless, hailin’ from a place there, b’y, where, Lard T’underin’ JAYziz, eh? you might jes’ hear some English you wouldn’t get anywhere else, I am forced to take issue with your punctuatin’Gah! Nothing specific right now. Sitting here in these chairs that I’m going to be proposing but in working with these governors who again on the front lines are forced to and it’s our privileged obligation to find solutions to the challenges facing our own states every day being held accountable, not being just one of many just casting votes or voting present every once in a while, we don’t get away with that. We have to balance budgets and we’re dealing with multibillion dollar budgets and tens of thousands of employees in our organizations.…OUGHT to express the following punctuatitude:Gah! Nothing specific right now, sitting here in these chairs, that I’m going to be proposing… but in working with these governors who, again, on the front lines are forced to – and it’s our privileged obligation to – find solutions to the challenges facing our own states every day. Being held accountable, not being just one of many just casting votes or voting present every once in a while. We don’t get away with that. We have to balance budgets and we’re dealing with multi-billion dollar budgets and tens of thousands of employees in our organizations.Let me be more clear: There is more than enough stupid in Sarah Palin’s brain and spoken word to prove her a blithering, vacuous idiot and render her obviously incompetent for high office. We need not torture her inane sputtering by inflicting any but the most generous commas and elipses.

  • prcleburne

    I get it. She’s going to be proposing chairs.

  • prcleburne

    In the election we had a choice between a brilliant,articulate candidate and a blithering idiot. The idiot got 47% of the vote. This is truly frightening.

  • http://www.englandforobama.com chantoozie

    I’m just amazed that she didn’t say “also”. Also.

  • 24hourjack

    republicans may just be wacky enough to nominate this hooplehead(sorry bob,ive fallen in love with your word) in 2012.however,if this “victory tour” lasts much longer theyll eventually have to catch on right?doesnt anyone like her enough to tell her to zip it?its like when noone likes you enough to tell you “hey,y’got a booger hangin out yer’ nose”.

  • http://pushingfiftygently.blogspot.com/ Jaliya

    Scrambled Brains for Prez in 2012!!The contrasts between Sarah Palin and Barack Obama are … astonishing. Perhaps the Rapture that she believes will happen will sweep all the genuinely stupid people off the planet and the rest of us can get on with the work of cleaning up humanity’s messes and living to our highest potential. Sigh … one can dream, eh? :-)