Prime Time Thread

Posted on 01/30/2009 at 6:25 pm by JumpyPants

Open thread for mocking the constant variety of cable news hackery and whatever else is dunking your donuts.

Tonight! How soon before Limbaugh tries to school Democrats on race?

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  • kansasdem

    The Republicans became a party of Black!Blacker than our our black!With a lot of “slack”!

  • jane

    I think I’m blacker than Michael Steele, just by virtue of being a woman…and not a republican.

  • gypsysoul

    that’s a quote worthy statement jane! paging theo…paging theo…quote comment two…quote comment two…

  • theo

    on it, gypsy.hey, PTT-ers!

  • Packy

    Janerooski, I done seen yer apparel. It’s pretty black… except for the red hair thing.

  • emsique

    Q: Why does Rush Limbaugh wear a tie?A: To keep his foreskin from slipping over his head.

  • jane

    The early devolution into foreskin jokes does not bode well for this Open Thread.

  • gypsysoul

    why is it when people stumble upon an unrecognized object they either smell it or stick their finger in it?!another credit to evolution:when faced with unknown object we smell or poke with great commitment. the truth is in there…

  • emsique

    Hey, Bob started it. Foreskin is loftier than the subject matter he wanted to start with.

  • jane

    Damn, Gyps, keep it light. No heavy philosophical statements please.

  • jane

    Fine line between philosophy of The Stink and lowly foreskin jokes.

  • MatthewN

    Found this quote today?

    Should any political party attempt to abolish social security, unemployment insurance, and eliminate labor laws and farm programs, you would not hear of that party again in our political history. There is a tiny splinter group, of course, that believes you can do these things. Among them are H. L. Hunt (you possibly know his background), a few other Texas oil millionaires, and an occasional politician or business man from other areas. Their number is negligible and they are stupid.-Dwight D. Eisenhower

    Just thought it was interesting.

  • jane

    I want to knock Ron Christie straight-eyed. Is that so wrong?

  • The Minx

    @Matthew–I loved your quote, very appropriate considering the kerfluffle of the last few days..@Gyps– I’m confused sweetie, what are you trying to say with this talk of poking and smelling with commitment? Is that better than poking and smelling just for fun??

  • gypsysoul

    jane, i can’t help it. this blog and you wonderful people make me want to be a better person…

  • ceu

    I want to pick him (Ron Christie) up, swing him by the legs, and smack Michelle Bernard with him.

  • jane

    Ooh, good one, Chris.

  • kansasdem

    I want to start a fund raising campaign to send Michael Steele on a cruise with Elvis and Jane!

  • gypsysoul

    theo, they are on a roll tonight…”I want to pick him (Ron Christie) up, swing him by the legs, and smack Michelle Bernard with him.”ceukansas…i am sure she would pay to watch elvis and steele go at each other. with intervals of her beating them! hehe…

  • jane

    And I would like to be sent on a cruise. The bashing of Republicans would merely be icing on the cake!Fundraising may begin, but the first $500 must go toward a new computer for DP, as she is sorely needed ’round these parts.

  • dontpanic23

    Thank you, Jane. And what a nice moment to walk in.

  • dontpanic23

    But you can’t give up a cruise. Bringin’ Axl?

  • jane

    BAM! I have The Timing.

  • dontpanic23

    You do that. And the spidey sense. What a combo.

  • jane

    Axl’s ire can prolly propel the boat.

  • theo

    Gyps! It’s not like I’ve ever missed anything!

  • dontpanic23

    Would make the trip cheaper–maybe work that laptop in after all.

  • dontpanic23

    Theo has the Quotey Sense.

  • gypsysoul

    theo, i love you, your cute little face and your bitchy’ness. ;)

  • jane

    DP, we know if the Panthers were in the SB, you wouldn’t be gracing us with your presence. (You’d be drooling over KO sitting there 40 hours early.)

  • ceu

    i hate football.there. i said it.

  • dontpanic23

    Damn tootin’. Football AND Keith trump anything else.

  • jane

    Is Ryan for reals? he said Redoubt erupted.

  • ceu

    Elwood says that Redoubt just erupted…

  • dontpanic23

    If it’s on de FB then it must be so.

  • gypsysoul

    ceu, acceptance is the first step…my sports go like this…tennisbeach volleyballfootballhockeysocceras if anyone cares! hehe…

  • ceu

    I take as for reals, Jane. Redoubt’s like Russia – he can see it from his house. Now, if he could just tell the ash to “shoo! Get back over there”…

  • dontpanic23

    Jane, is that connected to your tripping over a cement thingie? It was hardened Redoubt ash-n-shit?

  • ceu

    aw, gyps – four stupid (to a spectator) sports in the top five. :( All you’re missing is sports fishing…

  • dontpanic23

    Ooops, was a dream that reared its head over Alaska. Dreamlike “shoo”. Works every time.

  • jane

    “If it’s on de FB then it must be so.”DP is LOL as usual.

  • ceu

    nevermind – it appears he was just being a …. male.

  • jane

    So now he says he was kidding. I’m too tired to Google.

  • Packy

    Elwood can’t see Redoubt from his house today, anyway. We have low cloud cover and snow showers.

  • dontpanic23

    Now, to finish the rip, bring it here:Alaska: You’re causing a rip in the FB/GDAB space time continuum.

  • Packy

    And it’ll be dark soon, too, and such as.

  • jane

    And Packy, I hear you can’t see the light at night, because it’s dark and such as.

  • gypsysoul

    >>>four stupid (to a spectator) sportsi have/do play all of them. i guess that makes the difference…but i love watching them as well…i just saw cnn over on elvis’s post…i told it to come visit us on ptt…i doubt it will!

  • Kat

    So I’m confused. Did something erupt?

  • Packy

    Not unless it’s a REALLY spectacular eruption, with the Unholy Vagina™ shooting lasers and such as, Jane.

  • ceu

    it was a joke, Pack, so I could use the “shoo, get back over there” line – ’cause that never gets old.

  • Kat

    The Unholy Vagina? That sounds terrifying.

  • Packy

    I figured that out, Ceu… but we actually CAN see Redoubt, if the weather is halfway decent.

  • cminri

    Aren’t all vaginas holy by definition?

  • dontpanic23

    Zing! Howdy Cminri.

  • Packy

    Cminri – Maybe – but this one would definitely be Unholy, since it shoots lasers and shit like that.

  • cminri

    as long as they dont erupt Packy..

  • cminri

    hey DP – i zig..when you zag..

  • dontpanic23

    That evil twin thing…

  • Packy

    Erupting Unholies are the worst.

  • cminri

    okay..so now we know that unholy erupting vaginas are definite thread killers..

  • Packy

    It appears. Even if they shoot lasers and shit like that.

  • Kat

    OMG….Rachel in a pink hat. That was fucking hilarious.

  • Packy

    Dang. I can’t wait to get home and see teh Rachel.

  • ceu

    did you know that Michelle Bernard is married to Joe Johns?

  • jane

    What? I thought she was single.

  • ceu

    nope. Turns out she’s not even a virgin

  • Kat

    Interesting interview with Claire McCaskill over at the HuffPo.http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2009/01/30/mccaskill-lays-down-law-o_n_162662.html

  • GItheScholar

    I briefly skimmed the PTT and found the keywords that I slip into every resume: Foreskin and Stink. This may also answer the question of why I am still employed by the US Military.

  • jane

    Senator in the hizzy.Hello, Joe. What do you know?

  • ceu

    spy stories on Rachel!

  • GItheScholar

    Oh, I am blacker than Steele. I heard that toolbox open his mouth on “Real Time” and almost kicked a puppy. He actually had the balls to say that he didn’t think Sarah Palin was an ideological evangelical christian. Which sent me into a tangent of rage and fear. So I “smoked” ate some cheetos and climb down from the roof. However, this man is an insult to President Obama. The GOP strategy is,”He is black that should work” nothing more. He is literally a means to an end. Oh, they can also blame the black man for their losses in 2010 and 2012.

  • GItheScholar

    I know that Claire McCaskill is super sexy tonight. She blew me anyway(no pun intended) with the idea of going after the bottom feeding CEOs. It is fucking ridiculous that we allow someone to make that much money for driving a company into the dirt.HOLY SHIT!!!I was driving today and saw a truck that someone finger painted into the dirt, “IMEACH OBAMA 2009″ I laughed so hard I damn near wrecked my car. GOD BLESS AMERICA!!

  • gypsysoul

    gi, in a troll beating mood?! there is a live one on elvis’s postpost and it will come…

  • ceu

    Jesus, Joe. This is the same party that thought Sarah Palin was interchangeable with Hilary Clinton because they both have Teh Holy Vagina™ and they thought women wouldn’t notice the difference.

  • gypsysoul

    my mom told me to check out the latest “lovelys” in hometown newspaper…enjoy!just don’t mention my name if you lose your shit and have to contact someone over it! hehe… SERIOUSLY!http://www.mitchellnews.com/articles/2009/01/28/editorial/letters/letter01.txthttp://www.mitchellnews.com/articles/2009/01/28/editorial/letters/letter04.txt

  • GItheScholar

    >>Teh Holy Vagina™Hillary has a vagina? Is it hidden under her giant balls?For the love of all things holy please never refer to Sarah Palin’s vagina. It isn’t a vagina it is a birth super highway. We shall call it “Intervagina 95″

  • ceu

    anyone watch Rachel with the ex-Gitmo prosecutor? Catch it on replays if not.”Worst of the worst” with no evidence against them.Let them out. now. please.

  • Kat

    Rachel had a great interview with Col. Vandeveld. Gitmo can’t be closed soon enough.

  • theo

    (I wrote this on the PTT yesterday, but I don’t think anyone saw it, and I think it’s worth saying again, so I’m gonna repost.)This has been said before, but I’ve never gotten to say this in my young life, so I’m gonna go for it: 
I really like my president. I don’t just agree with his policies, and I don’t just think he’s a smart politician. I think he is a genuinely decent man who deeply adores his family, who wants to hear and understand people, and who wants to leave the world a better place than when he came to it. I don’t believe that he’s always going to do the right thing, but I do know that he’ll try, and I know that he’ll stay up late agonizing about it.
In other news: Bob, can you give us a post where you ask a question where the obvious answer is a yes so I can reply ‘yessiree Bob!’? Honestly, I’ve got a lot riding on this.

  • ceu

    McCain and Kyl both declined Obama’s invitation to the WH for the Super Bowl…HA!

  • Kat

    Since McCain and Kyl aren’t going, can I take their place at the White House Super Bowl Party? Please? Pretty please? I reeeeally don’t care about the game, so I would be the perfect guest.

  • SillyGit

    (I apologize for the cross post, this is from the Mr. Elvis the Dingeldein Thread. I want to be certain that cnn sees this.)cnn -There was nothing offensive about Maplethorpe’s photography. As a long time photographer, I wish I had 1/10th the technical and compositional skills that Maplethorpe possessed.Have you even seen his work? I saw it at MOMA in NYC and was completely blown away. His work is that stunning. I would have preferred scantily clad young ladies, but he didn’t consult me.The Europeans referred to us as ‘those barbarians that don’t like art’ because of the Maplethorpe fiasco. You may consider yourself in that group if you like. It’s nothing to be proud of.Jesse Helms once suggested that all of those nudes in Raphael’s painting should have clothes painted on them. Yeah, Jesse was an A1 art critic. Apparently nakedness is offensive, either sex. I wonder how he takes a shower.You are an ignorant twit. Jesse Helms was too.

  • SillyGit

    I saw that Theo. I hope you saw my reply.

  • theo

    git, I did, and thanks.

  • SillyGit

    Ana Marie was on Rachel’s show tonight. I am so happy.

  • ceu

    so…Hartford’s mayor got arrested

  • jane

    Any choir boys, hookers, or midgets harmed in this Hartford incident?

  • jane

    shorter jane: will Red write about it tomorrow?

  • ceu

    nah – federal bribery charges. although, i suppose they could have been involved somehow.luckily his hair is more conventional than Blago’s so he hasn’t been all over the cable news….

  • SillyGit

    Hartford’s mayor? What for? Let me guess….Ahhhhhhhh POLITICAL CORRUPTION?So let’s review the scoreboard over the last 15 years.Bridgeport – 1 mayor convicted of corruption (or was it 2)New Haven – 1 mayor charged with corruption, I don’t remember how that turned out.Waterbury – 2 mayors convicted of corruption, plus another mayor that went on to be Governor and was then convicted of corruption and shipped to a fed. pen. in PA.Hartford – 1 mayor arrested (for corruption?).Waterbury is still in the lead although Bridgeport is competitive.Danbury, Weathersfield, Farmington, and New Britain just aren’t making the attempt.Gotta love CT politics.

  • Redmond

    Write about who? What? Midgets? You can’t prove nothin’.

  • ceu
  • theo

    time check!

  • jane

    Did someone say (o)(o)?

  • gypsysoul

    haha! oh brother you make me laugh…has the achey breaky found you yet?!

  • gypsysoul

    jane, i think you boob alert needs a reduction!

  • Redmond

    Boob reduction?! I show up and you guys start blaspheming. Jesus Fucking Christ…

  • SillyGit

    TY Chris. Reading it now. The Courant is a great paper.

  • gypsysoul

    brother these nipples wouldn’t make you go fish eyed in the dark for a minute?! (o)(o)kinda like the first time i saw an uncut!

  • gypsysoul

    WHOAAAAA!!!! those boobs would cause more than a fish eye! hehe…

  • Redmond

    >> kinda like the first time i saw an uncut!I have walked into the wrong conversation.*dives into boobmine*

  • Alan4s

    An unfotunate place for a line-break gyps – looks to me like one of your boobies fell off and rolled across the floor.

  • theo

    this went fast in a bad direction.

  • gypsysoul

    well alan…we are in the days of mexican plastic surgery with a complementary breakfast buffet…

  • SillyGit

    He pulled a Ted Stevens. Ted got lots more than Eddie did.Gotta love CT politics.

  • Alan4s

    Mmmm, huevos rancheros and booby banditos!

  • Alan4s

    G’night all.

  • gypsysoul

    night alan!

  • ceu

    To be fair, though, Bridgeport’s mayor was convicted on 16 counts, so that ought to score more points.Which one was it that was arrested for having sex with a teenage girl right after he ran for senator? (I think – I might have just made that up)

  • SillyGit

    Is the boob signal a summons for boobman?Curious, not yellow.

  • ceu

    This is the one i was thinking of:Connecticut – Sexual Assault, Child PornographyInvestigation: Philip Giordano, former Republican mayor of Waterbury, CT,Disposition: convicted of forcing two 8 and 10 year old girls to perform oral sex on him. Sentenced to 37 years.Was Giordano included on your list, Git?

  • SillyGit

    Chris, that happened, I forgot about it. I don’t remember who that was, but I think it was one of the Waterbury politicians. I might be saying 2 mayors for corruption when it was actually 1 mayor for corruption, and 1 ex-mayor for screwing his girlfriend and her underage daughter at the same time (not at the exact same time, it was not a threesome.).

  • jane

    Git makes me laugh.

  • ceu

    forgot to include the link. (it’s quite an interesting list…)http://tn420.org/cove/page.php?id=13

  • gypsysoul

    sillygit, the boob alert activates redmonds implanted chip (implant location unknown) which causes massive sweat production and tunnel vision until boob is found. this is factual data that was provided to me by a fictional source.

  • SillyGit

    Yeah. That was him. A real class act. I counted him, but thought it was corruption.I didn’t know about another girl, I just remembered the one that was his girlfriend’s daughter. I think the other was a friend of the daughter.I forgot the kiddie porn part too.

  • ceu

    HA! The list isn’t even up to date. It’s more than 2 years old….so much sleaze missed…

  • theo

    if my mom finds a link for a cannabis website on my computer, I’m telling her to talk to you guys.

  • gypsysoul

    theo, blame it on axl!

  • gypsysoul

    gotta go guys. love ya, mean it! yes i said that with a valley girl voice out loud…

  • ceu

    Sorry, theo. I didn’t look at the website’s name, although I do admit that I noticed the icon on the tab…

  • Ady/Leigh

    Jane, GItheScholar, someone, anyone…Um, where’d the GOP find a black dude?Is he their Obama? B/c I don’t want them to have one yet, is that bad?

  • SillyGit

    ty gypsyty Chris. Nice site. The other Mayors on my list were democrats and so do not appear on that page.I didn’t know about Ahnold’s problems. How could he have an extramarital affair? I thought Maria kept his balls in a jar.

  • Ady/Leigh

    Forget the first question, I can’t stop laughing at “the uncut” comment…oh shit.

  • SillyGit

    Ady/LeighI am not certain that Michael “The Tool” Steele *is* a real Black Man. I have a theory that he is an anamatronic simulation of a black man that is controlled by the Klansman behind the curtain.

  • Ady/Leigh

    SillyGit, LOL. Thank god! I think trying to roll out their version of a “new and improved” President Obama this early is a bad idea. What if President Obama fails? What will they do with THEIR Obama?Steele better hope and pray President Obama does a bang up job, or he’s toast! The Republicans will do something violent and mean to get rid of his black ass…

  • Ady/Leigh

    Oh, Jane’s blacker than Michael Steele. Good. That’s very good.

  • theo

    silly, you think there’s a way we could prove that? Or, if we can’t, we can make it into a great movie.

  • Ady/Leigh

    Fact or fiction, you’re right, theo. It would be a great movie.

  • GItheScholar

    Ady,NO, Steele is a giant tool that does what he is told. No independent thought. Loves Palin and the hate mongering from the right. He is our Harry Reid in comparison.

  • Ady/Leigh

    GI, could they share a ticket in 2012? If they do, they lose SC. The same GOPers who love them some Palin, hate them some blacks…And Pres. Obama runs up the middle.Right? Please tell me that I am. Something about this is making me nervous and nauseated…

  • GItheScholar

    Ady,No, they will not share a ticket. He is the RNC chairman. Which means his job is to come up with a winning strategy for the GOP in 2010 and 2012 not to run for President/Senator/Congressperson. They will win some seats in 2010 but not enough to be a game changer. However, 2012 will be a GOP massacre and they will still get only 4% of the black vote nationwide. If Palin is on the ticket it might be 2%.

  • Ady/Leigh

    GI, Okay, I might feel a little better now.But this has me really confused: The GOP picked someone who couldn’t win a national election to come up with a strategy for winning a national election? I’m good that, I guess. So long as they keep driving that bus toward a fucking cliff, I don’t really care how fast they’re going when they finally drive OFF it.

  • ceu

    worked with Howard Dean…

  • Ady/Leigh

    I meant to say, “I’m good with that…” Ooops.Nervous and nauseated again. Thanks for reminding me, chris. Is that why I’ve been hearing Dean’s name tossed around on tee vee? Probably so…

  • SillyGit

    I disappeared to the 52 pickup thread for a bit. Elvis clobbered the ignorant right winger most thoroughly.Elvis rocks and is Goddamn Awesome.

  • SillyGit

    If they continue to take their advice from Rush the Limpball, I can’t see the Republican party being anything but a fringe cult. They drove the country off a cliff rather well, it appears that they now go for perfection with their party.

  • SillyGit

    Oops, Forgot Bob’s question.

    How soon before Limbaugh tries to school Democrats on race?

    I thought he did that this afternoon.If he didn’t, I’m sure he will by Monday. Never underestimate his arrogance or his gall.

  • Ady/Leigh

    Whew…I feel a little bit better again? I think I’ll go read that thread myself now.

  • cnnNews

    “I disappeared to the 52 pickup thread for a bit. Elvis clobbered the ignorant right winger most thoroughly.”Really? check out the followup.BTW I’ve stated it before, I’ll state it again to you. I’m a registered independent, not an “ignorant” rightwinger..Actually, it’s your generalized and generic view of the world that is predominantly “ignorant”, SillyGit.

  • Alan4s

    >>Really? check out the followup.Summary: CNN thinks his house is art, a silicoln chip is art, and pictures of things he doesn’t like is not art.Boy, did he show us!!

  • SillyGit

    If you are not an ignorant right winger, then why does what you say sound exactly like the statements made by 1930s fascists?There are lots of things that are art that I don’t particularly care for. I do not declare them to not be art because they are not to my tastes. I don’t particularly like Jackson Pollack for example.I do not worship Mapplethorpe. I consider him to be the best B&W photographer ever. You don’t have to agree with me, but I suspect that Ihave better qualifications to judge his work than you do. I don’t care for some of Mapplethorpe’s subject matter, but the photography is awesome.If you are proud of your narrow mind, then I pity you.Most of the best art throughout history was offensive to someone. Van Gogh’s work was considered to be very poor (and offensive) in his time. He had trouble giving it away. People who took his work in payment of debts hid his paintings in attics. Now his works command the highest prices for a single painting ever. Manet’s work was also considered offensive. Many Paris art galleries refused to exhibit his paintings for a very long time. He was nearly exiled from Paris for ‘Luncheon on the grass’ and again for ‘Olympia’, his nude painting of a famous Parisian courtesan (I saw this at a Manet special exhibit at the Met or MOMA in NYC, it is stunning. It normally hangs in Paris. I am a big Manet fan.). This painting was ‘offensive’ because she was a very famous prostitute and you could easily recognize her. “He should have modified her features so that you can not tell that it is her” said all of the tight-assed narrow minded twits who were, no doubt, her best customers.Using the metric of the number of people shouting that it’s not art, it’s offensive, has generally been a good indication that it will be declared an art masterpiece in 20 to 50 years time.Some art is intentionally offensive and/or disturbing. Try H. Bosch sometime.Art is supposed to broaden your thinking. The best art is painful to narrow minds.