Is Armstrong Chugging Pee?

Posted on 04/10/2009 at 10:23 pm by Bob Cesca

No. No he isn’t. Which is why this item from the New York Times about the latest Lance Armstrong doping allegation is extraordinarily disgusting, silly and disgusting:

“I’m not saying anything about Lance Armstrong,” said Dr. Gary I. Wadler, a member of the World Anti-Doping Agency. “But if somebody had half an hour to himself, that’s plenty of time to urinate and refill yourself with somebody else’s urine. That way, even if they witness you urinating, it’s not your urine. It happens a lot. It is the rationale behind the no-notice testing.”

BikeSnobNYC observes:

Why return to the sport from a few years of blissful unaccountability only to sneak around in bathrooms drinking other people’s urine? It just doesn’t make sense.

Indeed. There’s another theory that he injected urine directly into his bladder. Yeah, okay. Now that might actually be less appealing than drinking it. Either way, it’s a stupid theory. If Armstrong doped, he doped back when EPO was untestable (EPO is a drug that enhances the red blood cell count, and therefore augments the body’s ability to transfer oxygen to the muscles). Beyond that, I still have to go with that quaint notion of “justice” — you know, innocent until proven guilty and all that.

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  • bibimimi

    Lance, your copy of ‘Pissdrinkers’ for the month of April, ’09 will be slightly delayed.

  • Biology 101

    Dude, here is a refresher for human physiology. The human body peaks in its athletic ability at the age of 18. Never before steroids did athletes achieve greatness in their thirties, save for those records based on an accumulation of scores, i.e. homeruns in a career.Barry Bonda. Mark Magwire. Sammy Sosa. All peaked in their thirties and all were doing juice.Lance is a juicer. Why did he come back to drink someone else’s pee? He was jonesing for the attention. Same reason Jordan came back. And Ali. And Bret Favre.

  • fastfreddie

    I’m not going to comment on Lance’s history….but to say the human body peaks athletically at 18 is not only ridiculous, it speaks to your lack of pro cycling knowledge. An elite grand tour professional cyclist typically peaks in his/her late 20′s to early 30′s. To compare cycling to baseball, or American football for that matter, is beyond laughable. In this case, they took hair and blood samples as well….which all tested clean.

  • billydelyon

    Not sure how drinking piss would help the ‘Hair and Blood’ the guy also took from him in the same test….Hair and Blood are hard to cheat….

  • Alex

    Fastfreddie, that’s about the same age most baseball and football players “peak” actually.

  • bo

    The solution is simple: Make doping legal if you are over 18 years of age.Hey, we’re all adults here and we should be able to mess with our bodies if we want to if it doesn’t hurt anyone else. It’s just sports after all. It’s not like sports and games are really all that important. It’s just for fun, remember?They did all kinds of dope in the past before all this testing was developed. Eddy Merckyx is a legend and who knows for sure if he was doping or not. Who cares, he’s still a legend. All this testing just make sports WORSE.

  • SharksBreath

    He’s a cheater. Just like the great American hero Roger Clemens.In a sport where everyone is cheating.He wins his battle against Cancer. Is ready to quit cycling. Then he picks Cunningham as his trainer.Cunningham settled out of court a doping charge from a former rider.The 7 Eleven teamYou go from a guy who could barely win a stage in the Tour de France to coming off of cancer and being the greatest rider ever. After you meet your trainer Cunningham.Cunningham settled out of court a doping charge from a rider in 2001.OK.Better yet go read this.Walsh lays waste to the favorite chestnuts of Armstrong mythology, including the laughable fallacy that he possesses, literally, a “big heart” or the idea that his comeback successes can be attributed to weight he lost while battling cancer (he didn’t lose any). Whereas LeMond won his third Tour decisively, Armstrong took 36th place in his third, almost an hour and a half behind the yellow jersey. That, by the way, was the first Tour Armstrong was able to even finish; before that, he had always crumbled in the mountains, where the Tour is usually decided. In Walsh’s view, the pre-cancerous Armstrong was a solid all-around rider, but a below average climber—not the stuff of a Tour champion.http://thefanzine.com/articles/sport/147/mr._clean-_greg_lemond_and_pro_cycling%EF%BF%BDAos_doping_problem/1

  • SharksBreath

    He’s a cheater. Just like the great American hero Roger Clemens.In a sport where everyone is cheating.He wins his battle against Cancer. Is ready to quit cycling. Then he picks Cunningham as his trainer.Cunningham settled out of court a doping charge from a former rider in 2001.Lance goes from a guy who could barely win a stage let alone the entire race in the Tour de France to coming off of cancer and being the greatest rider ever. After you meet your trainer Cunningham.OK.Better yet go read this.Walsh lays waste to the favorite chestnuts of Armstrong mythology, including the laughable fallacy that he possesses, literally, a “big heart” or the idea that his comeback successes can be attributed to weight he lost while battling cancer (he didn’t lose any). Whereas LeMond won his third Tour decisively, Armstrong took 36th place in his third, almost an hour and a half behind the yellow jersey. That, by the way, was the first Tour Armstrong was able to even finish; before that, he had always crumbled in the mountains, where the Tour is usually decided. In Walsh’s view, the pre-cancerous Armstrong was a solid all-around rider, but a below average climber—not the stuff of a Tour champion.You can do it if you cheat.http://thefanzine.com/articles/sport/147/mr._clean-_greg_lemond_and_pro_cycling%EF%BF%BDAos_doping_problem/1

  • NoFactAllergies

    Dear “Lance is a cheater” theorists,Your knowledge of pro cycling and Lance’s history in it are anemic. Allow me to fill in.LA was hyped as a future tour winner before his illness (if only he lost a few kilos), lost and subsequently kept off a substantial amount of weight during his illness, and was mentored by 5-time Tour champ Miguel Indurain on cadence, etc before returning to the tour triumphant. It’s a power v. weight issue, as his tour-champion potential was well noted pre-cancer.If he is a cheater, he is one who has manged to slip by more administered doping controls than any other athlete in history, cycling or otherwise. He has also won many stages which were unnecessary to his overall classification in the Tour, only to expose himself to the automatic drugs controls administered to all stage winners.Walsh’s book is full of documented falsehoods, and it’s a bit silly to base allegations solely on the work of a tabloid writer who wants to sell books.Furthermore, it was revealed a few years back (not by LA or his associates) that LA had for many years donated substantial sums of money to anti-doping regulators to help perfect new testing techniques and mitigate cheating in the sport.Facts are pesky.

  • NoFactAllergies

    oops, almost forgot:The test we are talking about, like all others he has ever taken, was negative.Sometimes the simplest explanation is the best, and drinking wee to distort lab tests on hair and blood is a bit farther-fetched than just accepting him a a clean athlete until he fails his first test, eh?

  • Mary

    I don’t believe Lance Armstrong. He is using sophisticated PR deception techniques in leaking the bad news and then responding that he is “outraged” in order to get in front of the consequences of his disastrous encounter with AFLD. He has known from the start that he was in trouble for leaving the sight of AFLD but he had to do it anyway. Suspicious. It makes me think he set up his “accident” for cover. Read his tweets back to March 17. The tale is there. He has no doubt lost a significant amount of money in this fiasco. He is now desperate to hold onto a shred of credibility at any cost, my friends.

  • billydelyon

    Again, how does being out of the testers sight while he showered (I mean drank piss, well according to all you who think he cheated anyway) allow LA to pass the test through his blood and hair samples??Please explain…