Tortured Logic

Posted on 04/20/2009 at 3:38 pm by Bob Cesca

Limbaugh today:

“[I]f somebody can be water-tortured six times a day, then it isn’t torture.”

Just remarkable. Even after the Bush OLC memos admit that all of these techniques were, in fact, torture, Limbaugh is still trying to obfuscate the definition.

If it’s not torture, and KSM could easily withstand it, then why bother in the first place? You’re negating your own argument in support of torture, Limbaugh. Or better yet, put yourself to the test. Hitchens tried it. Why can’t you? If it’s so innocuous, why not experience first hand what all the fuss is about.

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  • http://www.gravesdig.blogspot.com David

    Bob,Wanted to thank you again for your logical decimation of these inane comments. Keep up the good work!

  • m4rk0

    “[I]f somebody can be punched in the face six times a day, then it isn’t torture.”

  • Tbest

    You should start a petition challenging Limbaugh to let himself be water boarded. I mean if he could handle slapping himself in the face, then surely he could handle water boarding. I’ll be the first signature.

  • http://www.xkcd.com/ Silly Ratfaced Git

    He won’t agree to being waterboarded because he doesn’t want to be mistaken for Shamu. Also they will need an I-beam instead of a board.

  • Adam

    For this experiment to actually work, he would have to prove that it was both effective yet not torture, right? So, what questions would you ask Limbaugh to prove that he broke?Why did you have so much viagra on your trip to the Bahamas?

  • http://www.xkcd.com/ Silly Ratfaced Git

    Question for the flabmeister.If a person could have six of their fingers crushed one at a time with a vise in one day, would that be torture?Would you like to volunteer?No, I thought not.

  • http://tarackian.deviantart.com J M Ashby

    Lets waterboard Lush Rimjob 6 times a day and then see what he says.

  • Elvis Teh Dingeldein

    “Water torture” for someone of Limbaugh’s glopulous girth is being forced to drink more than a glass of it a day, foregoing his usual ritualistic consumption of Mountain Dew, Red Bull and Slim-Fast shakes laced with barbituates and red peanut M&Ms.

  • http://www.politicalpartypooper.wordpress.com politicalpartypooper

    It wouldn’t be torture to Rush. The sick fuck probably gets off on being choked.

  • GItheJOE

    Elvis,Lets us not forget the 15 hydrocodone or Oxycontin that would be in that one glass of water.

  • http://www.politicalpartypooper.wordpress.com politicalpartypooper

    One further item. We were taught the various methods one could use to disarm or disable a man in close quarter combat. All of those methods pertained to their immediate survival, and none of those methods would have resulted in death, or even a physical mark being left.For instance, I taught my daughter a method whereby she could “remove” the breath from a man’s throat quickly, without doing any permanent harm, yet rendering him completely unable to defend himself for better than a minute. Much more effective than the old family jewel kick.I’ve experienced that method myself, and if used in interrogation, it sure as hell would be considered torture. I won’t name it, but there are many other ways to use these “survival” issues against a prisoner. The key is ALWAYS threatening survival immediately. When you take a person’s breath away, you take everything away. Pain isn’t necessary. A man is unable to defend OR control himself when his most basic, immediate survival need is withheld.Anything that approaches this threshold should be considered torture, especially because you can apply these methods quickly, and repeatedly. Our law specifically denies us the option of cruel and unusual punishment.I should think “cruel and unusual” would define itself by it’s very nature of being so different from the norm.

  • pablo

    His listeners are tortured 3 hours a day, 5 days a week. Is it REALLY torture?It would be for me.

  • http://www.xkcd.com/ Silly Ratfaced Git

    Hehe. Excellent pablo.

  • brutlyhonest

    I suppose the count gets reset every time the subject passes out? The crime here is that people who listen to his (and the faux noise) propaganda believe everything he says and then repeat it. A neighbor was telling my wife yesterday that she’s against bringing the Gitmo prisoners to the US because after they’re here too long they become US citizens; and they’re too dangerous to be here.

  • Splendid One

    My wife and her walking group, a week ago, were out on one of the dirt roads where we have lived for nearly 25 years, and they discovered two 3-week old calves, loose on the road.They went up to the nearby farm house and alerted them to this. The calves clearly knew the woman of the house and went where she told them. Nice rescue! :) Then (don’t know whether it was the man or the woman of the household) she heard: “Earlier this month one of our calves went disappeared – stolen by one of those damned Ayrabs from Detroit.”I wish I had been there. My wife, nicer than I am, didn’t point out that perhaps the calf had wandered away like those two had, and ended up in a black pond instead of being found on the road.These folks just fear anything different than themselves. It’s sad, but (I hope) it’s history.

  • Syphon

    Even better than this, today on Hardball, Michael Smerconish said that it wasn’t torture, and was being blown way out of proportion since it was only 3 people and an average of 20 seconds each time.Apparently, torture has a time limit.

  • D. C.

    You need at least 4 people to torture.I really wonder how these jackholes sleep at night. Probably on top of a hooker.

  • Burbank_Ben

    Great logic there Rush:Limbaugh today:”[I]f somebody can be water-tortured six times a day, then it isn’t torture.”By that logic, I should be able to electrically shock your nuts six times a day. You’d survive, so I guess that wouldn’t be torture.Wanna give that a try? Again, it’s not torture.