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Crazy Stories

Written by SK Ashby

(Cartoonist - Pat Bagley)

In other news, Trump will travel to Asia next month but he's leaving a day early and skipping the East Asia Summit because he might get cranky with a full diaper.

Multiple administration officials told me there was a lengthy debate inside the Trump administration about the summit, but officials close to Trump were concerned the president did not want to stay in the region for so long and worried he could get cranky, leading to unpredictable or undiplomatic behavior.

Meanwhile, congressional Republican leaders have reportedly iced Rep. Dana Rohrabacher’s (R-CA) out of official business because he's a Kremlin stooge.

Finally, Senator Jeff Flake has announced he won't seek reelection in 2017 because the Republican party has become completely batshit under Trump.

"Here's the bottom line: The path that I would have to travel to get the Republican nomination is a path I'm not willing to take, and that I can't in good conscience take," Flake told The Republic in a telephone interview. "It would require me to believe in positions I don't hold on such issues as trade and immigration and it would require me to condone behavior that I cannot condone."