The monkeys in India are going batshit and attacking people.
"Monkeys are wreaking havoc in my constituency by taking away mobile phones, toothpastes, sipping coke after opening the refrigerators," Hiren Das told Assam state's assembly.
"It is a cause of serious concern in my area, with more than 1,000 such simians turning aggressive by the day," fumed Goneswar Das, another legislator representing Raha in eastern Assam.
A pack of terrorist MonkeyofascistsTM assassinated the deputy mayor of New Delhi!
Last month, the deputy mayor of Delhi died when he fell from his balcony after being attacked by monkeys.
I promised something silly, but... oh shit, piss and corruption! The monkeys are going nuts because...
Because of shrinking forest cover, monkeys have increasingly moved into cities elsewhere in India as well.